People are systematic

I was reading this article today and was struck by the line "The trick to dealing with [people] is not to think of them as human beings, but as systems that you have to make act the way you want." Now, this can be taken way too far, but there is a nugget of truth there.

People are not machines where you can guarantee outputs based on inputs. Humans always have choice, even if they choose not to exercise it, but people do work systematically. They tend to do things a certain way and according to a certain process because that has worked for them in the past. In that respect it is possible to predict with a high degree of likelihood what a person will do in a given circumstance.

There are a few tricks to doing this though. First, this is observational science not hard science. It is statistical and so I keep in mind that there's always the possibility that things will go differently. It's like betting on a roll of a pair of dice. If given a choice I'll always bet that the dice will come up to total seven because that's the statistically most likely number to come up. However, I'm always ready to assume that I may get something else.

Second, I begin to observe the person and analyze them. Since I can't control what their particular situation is I try to gather as much mental information as I can so that I can get the core ideas down. Soon I have a framework of how the person thinks and works. From there I can work with them in the way that they prefer to work. I can give them inputs with a high degree of knowing what the outputs will be.

The biggest trick though is to be detached. As an INTP I have a high level of empathy with people. I have a naturally strong "theory of mind" for the person across from me and I feel what they feel. This can quickly be exhausting. So, I need to break things up a bit. I have to decide what is important to observe and what is not and filter out the noise. Only then is it possible to accurately deconstruct and systemize what I have learned.

This can be most helpful in business. Most people work with expectations. In its most extreme form you end up with a government bureaucracy where every little banal thing has a form that must be filled out perfectly or it gets sent back. While we can (almost) all agree that this is ridiculous, there are varying degrees of this mindset. People need specific information to take action. They need specific requests to be able to switch into the right mindset to do what you need.

In business people say things like, "That's not the right way to do that," "That's not my job," "Well, he didn't get me what I need," or "How was I supposed to know that?" These are all indicators that the person was observing the situation from a particular system, did not recognize the input, and failed to produce the desired output. Because of this expectation on their part I can build a useful procedure or system on my end to get the desired output.

I think of these people as "black boxes". I input x, y, z and I'll most likely get product 983. If sometimes I get product 783 instead then I look to see how I can improve the inputs without trying to fix the black box. What if I also input a and b? What if I input items in the order z, x, y? I experiment a bit until I get the highest degree of predictability as I can. Then I accept some minor variation in the system.

Doing this allows me to objectively see people. This keeps me from being frustrated by them and experiencing a lot of uncomfortable emotions. It also allows me to minimize contact with people, increase my own effectiveness, and generally make my life easier.

What's the process I go through? It's simple really:

1. What do I want to get out?
2. What does the other person most want to get that also gets me what I want?
3. How can I most effectively and efficiently give that to them?
4. Test - assess - improve - repeat.